This blog is based on Episode 2 of the Get Divorced Without Getting Screwed Podcast. If you want to listen, click here.
How can we help men get through a divorce without getting screwed? We must start with preparation. We must start before you into the divorce process. Before getting into the "how" of preparing for divorce, it is important that you understand "why" you need to prepare for divorce.
There are many things that we could start with, but we want to start with something very basic. You should be preparing to get divorced because your spouse probably is already. That is the most basic reason that you should be preparing to get divorced. But, there is a little bit more to it.
Facts are the Facts
The problem with being unprepared is that there's nothing much we can do about it once you start the process. When you go to an attorney's office, you're going to be asked a bunch of questions about your life. When were you married? How many kids do you have? Where do you work? How much money do you make? What does your work schedule look like? What kind of assets do you have? How much equity is in your house? How much credit card debt do you have?
You are going to be asked all of these questions. What should become obvious when you start answering those questions is that those are the facts. Those are the facts that exist in your life. When you're starting the divorce process, you can't change them. You can't modify them. Once you start, they are what they are.
Now you can see why divorce preparation is important. You need to do everything you can to mold your facts to give you the best chance at a better result. We are not going to tell you that if you prepare the way we teach you that will get the perfect result that you want in your divorce. What we're talking about is putting yourself in a better position to get a good result.
Divorce Preparation is NOT Legal Advice
Remember that we are not here to tell you what the law is or what you are "entitled" to. Our goal is to get you better facts so that you can have an attorney get you a better result. We are not here to tell you if you're gonna be paying alimony or how you will divide your house. We are not going to tell you how much child support you are going to pay, or who is going to get custody of the kids. You are not going to learn what the parenting schedule is going to look like, or how we are going divide all your credit card debt. We are not here to talk about any of those things.
We are here to teach you how you can prepare for divorce so that when you go to an attorney and you tell them the facts of your life, that attorney can tell you because of those facts, here is the result you're gonna get. And guess what? That result will be better than you would have gotten without preparation.
You don't want to be Sorry for Poor Decisions
If you do not prepare, you will bring your life to an attorney and find out there is nothing that an attorney can do. There is nothing an attorney can do about the fact that you worked too much and did not spend time with your children. You can't do anything about the fact that your spouse did not work at all. Those bad facts should upset you. If you open your eyes and pay attention to what's going on in your marriage, you can know when the end nears so you can start preparing for divorce (whether or not you end up starting the process). You can start making subtle and substantial changes to your life so you can get a better result. Remember that better doesn't mean perfect. Better means better.
So, why should you prepare for a divorce? Because your wife is preparing and without preparation, you will not get the result that both you and your children are entitled to. Learn more about how we can help you prepare by clicking here.